Friday, October 06, 2006

Feeling dumb as a stump

Earlier this week I had to take a "standarized test". All I had to do was take it, no passing with a certain score, just required that I take it. Already a waste of an afternoon when stuff was piling up left and right.

These kind of test can kiss my ass on a number of different levels. Have you seen the questions that they ask on those freakin things? I mean come on! How often does the average person in their normal day, "solve for X"?

Bear in mind that the last kind of general education class that I had was eons ago, but I'm not a complete moron. Looking at most of these questions I was was thinking, "What the fuck? Ask me normal questions that REALLY apply to a standard of real life!"

Like this, here's some math! You have this amount of money, and you need to put gas in your car to get to work, but gas costs a shitload. How much gas can you put in your ride to get to work and back and still have enough green in your pocket to buy some lunch and a pack of smokes? That's a good question!

Here's another! You're getting cable installed at your place, and the cable guy will be there sometime between 8 and 5. How much of your day is gonna be wasted waiting on his ass?

And another "standard" question that should be on these tests, a lady you have the hots for says "she really likes you as a friend". What are the chances of your getting in her pants?

See? Now if you put questions like these on those tests, questions that apply to the shitty existence that we all have, national test scores would be so much higher, and we wouldn't have the media screaming at us that national test scores are constantly falling and that all Americans are about as bright as a dead roach.

Until that time when these tests become a true "standard" I request, that for every question on the current test, you add another answer to all questions..........

And that is..........Who the hell cares?

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